The Interview

My friend VegasGustan (I'm being lazy but his links are the ones over there on the right called "Home But Far From It" and "Song Repository") interviewed me, and here are my answers to his brilliant questions:
1. If you could rewrite the ending to one book how would you change it?
I would end Chuck Palahnuik's Invisible Monsters after the person who shot the model in the mouth confesses to the shooting. Because after that is just mindless backstory on why it was done, and who really cares? The reasoning takes away from the shock the reader would have felt. What I would have thought about the reasoning would have been far more complex and interesting than the "true reasons." Writers are so scared of leaving questions in the readers' minds, when a responsible reader would fill those answers in with his/her own answers rather than waiting for it to be spelled out for them. And I don't think that writers should leave things open that you can't make your own hypotheses without stretching too much, because that's not responsible either. A writer should lead you to the water and expect you to drink, not force you. Wow, and now we're all asses. :) And I'll step down from my soapbox. (For all the Palahnuik fans out there, I do really love his writing and his storylines. Invisible Monsters was the only one so far that I've read and been irritated by the ending.)
Oh, another one I'd change is anything by James Paterson. But then I'd change the end by burning a hole through it. But you already knew that, didn't you? :)
2. Do you hold any regrets so far that you would care to share with the class?
I really try not to regret things. I do things I should regret, but I've always been big on not regretting, because really what purpose does it serve? I think if there's something that does come to mind it's that I regret stealing from my mother when I was a teenager. I think it's something all teenagers did, but I've really tried to make up for it as an adult by helping her out with money whenever possible. She doesn't often take it, but I still try to force it on her. I didn't realize how little she really had back then.
3. If you could have taken anything to show-and-tell back in the day what would have it been?
I'd like to carry around the little boy I punched in kindergarten while the lights were out and we were getting ready to watch a movie. He was always teasing me and I could never get him back, so one day right before a movie I went up behind him and slugged him in the back. That way I could show-and-tell I really can stick up for myself!
4. You wake up in a future where you are now considered a complete savage and cavewoman-like, how do you try to fit in?
I go to work, because you're always required to be somewhat of a savage. If I'm completely a savage maybe I'll be even better. My problem with my job is that I think I have too much empathy. Maybe this kind of change would do me good.
5. (James Lipton Moment) What turns you off?
People who pretend they're more intellegent than they are, or feign intellect by enunciating every word so it sounds deliberate and therefore more stable and important than everyone else's speaking. And when people talk over you. And bad breath, that really turns me off.

The Rules
1. Leave me a comment saying 'interview me please'
2. I will respond by asking you five questions on your blog (not the same questions you see here)
3. Update your blog/site with the answers to the questions
4. Include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same post
5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, ask them five questions


L said...

okay, I'll bite since you drove me to a lovely bookstore :)

I enjoyed meeting your brother-- he REALLY reminds me of me at that age (believe it or not), only I think I may have spoken a lot less. And my legs were a lot less hairy, of course.

You can interview me, if you like.

aka_monty said...

I would offer myself up...but I'm a TERRIBLE interviewee.

So instead I'll simply say HELLO, MICHELE SENT ME! :)

Guppyman said...

I'll have to go with the Monty way of thinking... I'll just say hello from Michele...

Anonymous said...

Checkin out the post. Joan here
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will bookmark

VegasGustan said...

Great answers. I still think you should give one Patterson book a try though. C'mon at least it is not Harlequin Romance.

Dumbass Reporter said...

I wont be able to play because of my blogs main mission, but it sounds like fun.

Hi, Michele sent me!

Mama M said...

Hello. I'm game. Please interview me if you'd like. Michelle sent me.